Thursday, June 17, 2021

HEARING THE VOICE OF GOD

 

HEARING THE VOICE OF GOD - AUDIO



My daughter often comes to me very frustrated because she sees me writing all the time and she knows that this is often from what the Most High speaks to me.  What she does not understand is what it took for me to be able to hear.  She does not understand the many voices that I had to silence in the process to have learned to recognize and distinguish between that which is of the world, mine or just happen stance in the context of not reading too much into everything. 

The world is filled with opinions.  Pretty much about everything and with the help of social media, everybody gets to add their own to the broth.  And the sad thing is that curiosity gets the best of us and we drink from this broth of opinion.  After all…it’s free.  And nobody can tell the world what to say or think, but sadly many Christians come to drink of this broth and their minds are filled with these opinions, these voices.  Add the incessant call of our messages we receive on our phones and the fact that nowadays people can see when you have read a message, which silently portrays to everybody, “message received”, but what could the reason be why we ignore it by not responding?  We insist that they answer our messages immediately.  With that comes the entitlement of immediate answers to all requests that has subconsciously been projected on the Most High…”why is He not answering?  I know He heard me.”  And have I mentioned the incessant voices of children who seems to major in the art of moaning?  Or how about the demands of children and school activities, apart from the working mom or dad that has to do their job?

Our own voices from our particular inner dialogue that has been formed through the years run like a wild fire through everything we do.  There is the perception we have of ourselves and how we view the world sees us.  Also our own view of ourselves.  Then there is the constant internal dialogue of our walk with the Lord.  The guilt trips, the “to do lists”, our circumstances that demands our attention and a solution and the list goes on and on.  Not to mention all the inner dialogue that comes with when we do think we heard His voice.  “Was that really He or just I making things up?”   

To top it off, the Word says that our warfare is not against flesh and blood, but against principalities and powers and wickedness in the air.  That our weapons of warfare are not carnal, but mighty in God for the pulling down of strongholds, casting down imaginations that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, taking every thought captive and bringing it into obedience of God.  To top it off even further, the enemy has developed technology that is able to implant thoughts in our minds, which causes people open to this to think that it is their thoughts.  This will also increase during the last days.  This basically means that not only is the world shouting in our ears, our circumstances, our own thoughts and our cell phones, but the enemy as well is using these very things to build strongholds, to imprison us in walls of voices.  And then we wonder why we do not hear Him?

Endless voices around us and in us. 

And the softest and most gentle voice of all in the midst of all this clamor is His voice.  It is not that He is not talking, but rather it is that the line is busy.  Very busy.  There are people that also believe that God does not want to talk to them and that the Bible is enough.  It is true, the Bible is enough.  There is also people that believe that God does not talk to anybody anymore and that people who hear His voice have either a God-complex or are given over to their imaginations.  The reality is that the Bible is enough.  Everything you need to know is in the Word.  But the Word of God is to be read and understood with the Spirit of God who resides within us.  It is a journey of discovery as every single word has so many meanings, more than the Strong’s Concordance could give us.  He is the Living Word and it is His desire to expand our ability to take in the deeper things of Him.  To dive into the depths of His Word not just through the letter in understanding, but in the depths of revelation that comes through an intimate clear line of communication. 

All these voices have one aim.  It silences faith and faith is synonymous with rest.  He clearly states in His Word in Hebrews 11 that without faith it is impossible to please Him.  These voices are designed and purposed to distract, derail and destroy our faith, which is to come into His rest.  From the beginning of the Industrial Age, life has taken flight with the Wright Brothers when they made the first airplanes.  Scientifically it is proven that since then more discoveries have been made since all of history before that up and until now.  Life as we know is running at high speed, but we are not of this world and somehow the World Wide Web is more than just our connection to data, but it is the very web that is imprisoning His children for the sake of information.  Rest has become something we do after we have finished work.  However, He has called us to live by faith, that is to say live in His rest.  We enter into His rest by faith with the intention to stay in His rest.  Most people find this rest in their morning devotional, but leaves it in the room once they are done…life calling very loudly.  The quiet tranquility of His presence much appreciated, but the busyness of our minds derailing whatever tranquility was there.  Like busy bees we not only go from one task to another, but we also aim to do as much as possible at the same time…experts at multitasking.  Indeed, we are the like Microsoft…all windows open.  Our open files in our minds look like the teachings given on a YouTube channel where all are open and accessible at a click of a button. 

I hope you can understand why in today’s “rat race” the voices are so loud and make it almost impossible in order for us to hear Him.  Even our dreams are busy, running wild with all the information received during the course of the day, that in our rest, our sleep, we do not get rest.  People are tired and that has a lot to do with the speed of life.  And, of course the enemy would like to tell you that if you do not keep up with life, you will be left behind. Once again the fact that we are not part of this world becomes something we say with a focus on the future as if this truth has no relevance to our present.  We are now not part of this world and the rest to come of being in heaven, is also the rest that we are to have as being seated in heavenly places with Him.  I have found my most productive times in His rest, which is outside of time and carries with it His anointing, which always resulted in doing much more than being outside of His rest, driven by a need to finish things.

So the solution is obvious.  We need to silence these voices.  This is the journey that He took me on, however not by the absence of these things.  All is to be worship and we are to use all for His glory as well as learn how to glorify Him in our circumstances, often allowed by Him for our learning.  We have to learn the art of being still within, which is our mind.  This is probably why the Buddhist are seen as the most peaceful people having emptied their minds.  There meditation is that of emptying it and just to think on nothing. This is a very dangerous practice.  We are NEVER to think of nothing.  We are to think of the things above and allow Him to enter every thought.  This includes hearing a prophetic word, because in that moment we line up the prophetic word with the written word for the purpose of discernment.  You cannot “open your mind and not think of anything else” and just receive when listening to a prophetic word.  This is very dangerous practice.  When the word says that we are to take every thought captive, it does not say only those thoughts you deem destructive or negative.  It simply means ALL.  All our thoughts have to be brought into obedience.  This is no easy task, even more so than in the time of when Paul wrote this.  However, the good Lord would not have required this of us if in fact it was not possible.  So the solution is not to empty our minds, but to know what to allow in and when and to take them captive.

Did you know that the Most High is never in a hurry?  Yes, He is outside of time so time does not hold Him, but you never read of Jesus running from the next miracle to the other in the Word.  What you do hear is words like “My time has not yet come”.  Time was subject to Him.  And we are in Him and therefore it is important that we learn to be in step with Him.  Not to run ahead, not to lag behind, but to be synchronized in the guidance of the Spirit.  The Word says they that are the sons of God are led by the Spirit of God.  They do not lead the Spirit, but they themselves are led by the Spirit.  The Spirit does not run after them trying to bless every assignment the sons and daughter of God do, but they follow Him.  They are in step with Him.

Think of this quiet and restful state in Him as to when you swim and go into the water.  Once you are in, life still goes on, but you hear nothing except the swooshing of the water as you go deeper.  You are aware of nothing else except the feel of the cool of the water on your body, the pressure of the water and the silence.  Indeed silence is golden.  There is a sense of security in that silence and somehow time stands still.  We know we need to come back up for air or suffer the fait that comes with not doing so, but in that instance that we do, all our senses are revitalized and in tune with the noise of life.  The aim is to stay under water, to stay in His rest and only allow that which is of Him in His time into the water.  The aim is not for us to leave the water and deal with life.  This is no easy task considering just how much demands our attention.  The voices allowed must carry His approval.  Also we have to learn to only think of one thing at a time.  The New Agers call this to “be present”.  It is so typical of the enemy to coin a phrase for his evil purposes and then it steals from the truth so that Christians feel that it does not apply to them.  Discernment is so important and with that wisdom.  Although being “present” sounds very good and allows us to savor the moment like one would do with a good rounded glass of red wine, or a nice slab of chocolate, the focus for us, is to be present with Him.  It is His presence we have to remain in as with the example of the water.  When we start to do all for the sake of love, and I mean all, and to worship Him in all we do, we invite Him into our thought process and consequently we lean not on our own understanding. 

Proverbs 3: 5 – 7

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the Lord, and depart from evil.

 

This understanding is not just our view on something that we are not to lean on, but the very thoughts that we are to take captive and bring into obedience.  In this way we acknowledge Him in all our ways and not just by merely verbalizing our desire to do something for Him.  This is the act of acknowledging Him, which is to bring Him into what we are doing.  Here He speaks to us in the menial and ordinary and it becomes sacred.  Here He speaks to us in the smallest and seemingly insignificant and it becomes a revelation of who He is.  All this outside of our devotional time in the morning set apart for Him, so that our whole life becomes a devotional.  But this is something we have to practice daily and minute by minute.  If it was easy we would have called it a 10 step program.  But this is a way of life. 

For this reason we read in Isaiah 55 the invitation that He extends to us to come and eat of His bread and drink of the fatness of His milk and honey.  This honey is synonymous with revelation.  He says the milk and wine we spend our money on will not last.  That which all our effort and understanding goes into is temporary.  This is in a way a reference to the wisdom of this world, but also a reference to manna that only lasted a day.  He is that living manna or bread from above that lasts not just for a day, but is alive in you.

John 6: 30 - 35

30 They said therefore unto him, What sign shewest thou then, that we may see, and believe thee? what dost thou work?

31 Our fathers did eat manna in the desert; as it is written, He gave them bread from heaven to eat.

32 Then Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Moses gave you not that bread from heaven; but my Father giveth you the true bread from heaven.

33 For the bread of God is he which cometh down from heaven, and giveth life unto the world.

34 Then said they unto him, Lord, evermore give us this bread.

35 And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst.

Manna is always a reference to the written word.  That which we feed on when we live in the wilderness.  Jesus said that man shall not live from bread alone, but from every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.  Just think of how vital that statement is to us who need to hear the voice of God.  It is His spoken and not just His written word.  He is the voice of God unto us, speaking to us not only through His written Word, but He Himself is the LIVING WORD in us. This is why He told His disciples that unless they eat of His flesh and drink of His blood they would have no part in Him.  The issue here is digesting.  That of consuming Him.  Not in the context of cannibalism.  The context here is to take in, to become one as the very meal that you will eat later subsequently becomes one with you.  If we do not eat, we cannot live.  In the same way He is saying, “You have to eat from Me, the Living Word in order to live”. 

For this reason we read further in Isaiah 55…

Incline your ear, and come unto me: hear, and your soul shall live; and I will make an everlasting covenant with you, even the sure mercies of David.

Herein lies the problem we have with the many voices that demands our attention.  When we hear what He says then our soul shall live.  It will live from the words He speaks to you.  You hear with your spirit, but your spirit, which is to say the spirit of your mind needs to be available to Him, free from preconceived ideas, your own agenda and demands.  It has to be free from anything that may impede or even stifle His still small voice.  This is the essential condition needed, one where our thoughts are taken captive and therefore any determination from our part silenced, so that we may receive what He desires to say to us and write on the blank pages of our hearts.  Free in our minds of any necessity towards our own end, given over to His will.  This includes spiritual ends that we think is needed.  The essential condition for hearing the voice of God is the absence of any clamor, noise and inward exercise of our own souls. 

Once again in Isaiah 55 He says the following well known verse.

 

Isaiah 55: 6 – 10

 

Seek ye the Lord while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near:

Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the Lord, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

10 For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:

Now obviously we are not the wicked, but the reality is that this scripture wholeheartedly is applicable to us.  And therefore it would behoove us to indeed forsake our thoughts that we may incline our ears to hear His voice and our soul shall live.  What a wonderful promise!  He further goes on to say that when He speaks He will give seed to the sower.  This means that you will actually be able to give something that will produce more of its kind in another person’s land, which is their heart.  This in turn, will be bread to the eater, those who are hungry for righteousness.  In this way, that which He speaks to us will never return void.  We are His sowers, but we have to forsake our thoughts and ways, incline our ear and hear. 

Isaiah 55: 11 - 13

11 So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.

12 For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.

13 Instead of the thorn shall come up the fir tree, and instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle tree: and it shall be to the Lord for a name, for an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.

We have to remember that all of what I have spoken of thus far is in conjunction with the written Word of God.  What He says to you will be confirmed in His Word or literally be scripture that He speaks to you.  Jesus likened His Word to a sower that goes out and sows the seed on the land.  Various ground conditions are discussed in the parable of the sower, but the one I want us to focus on, although all three vital on this subject of hearing His voice, is the last one.  Let’s read in Mark 4 what He is saying to us.

Mark 4: 7 - 8

And some fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up, and choked it, and it yielded no fruit.

And other fell on good ground, and did yield fruit that sprang up and increased; and brought forth, some thirty, and some sixty, and some an hundred.

Notice that just as in Isaiah 55 He says that when we forsake our thoughts and ways, and incline our ears that there will be no thorns and briers.   In the parable of the sower a description is given of those who have these thorns and briers on their land.  The land, that is to say their spirit, does not receive the seed, that word sown.  This is once again not just the written word, but the spoken word. 

And he said unto them, He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.

By this statement He is making it clear that not everybody are able to hear.  Why?  Because of these very thorns and briers.  Our busy thoughts and anxieties.

18 And these are they which are sown among thorns; such as hear the word,

19 And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.

20 And these are they which are sown on good ground; such as hear the word, and receive it, and bring forth fruit, some thirtyfold, some sixty, and some an hundred.

I think this is self-explanatory, but the similarity from this parable to Isaiah 55 is very telling.  We have to learn daily to practice His presence by being conscious of our thoughts of Him in whatever we do.  We have to be conscious of our thoughts that goes to and fro like unruly children in the classroom of our thoughts and take every single one captive, ever time, asking, “Am what I am thinking subject to what He is now busy with me, even in this menial every day activity?”  We have to deal with the thoughts of doubt and guilt that tells us either we are not hearing from Him or that we are making it up.  We have to deal with the idea that we think that He does not want to talk to us when scripture clearly tells us that He is inviting us to come and listen what He wants to say.  We have to ensure that we lay down all preconceived ideas and hidden agendas of the heart, forsake our thoughts, so that we may take up His.  This takes a commitment, it takes a determination to deal with the negative thoughts that tell us that it is not for us and for that matter, saying presently to you now that you will never be able to get it right.  Like all other things on our journey this will take diligence and faithfulness to His purposes.  This will take of you persistent undertaking of taking captive all your thoughts, all the time.  Like a muscle it will grow and it will in the end become natural to you.  But it will take time.  For that reason it is also important to journal if possible because journaling helps to categories our thoughts.  It takes critical thinking to place it on paper and not just let it run around in our mind.  What you need is to not give up and to pursue Him for this, if this is your earnest desire. 

With this way of life and as the communication line between you and Him becomes clearer, you will hear clearer.  In the beginning it will still be like a static line that has interference, but if you are willing to climb a mountain to get a Wi-Fi connection, surely you are willing to climb a spiritual mountain to get a clear signal from Him?  All the way He will walk with you up this mountain until you reach the top and recognize that He never once left your side.  This is also where you learn to discern on the basis not only of the written Word of God, but also your personal journey with Him.  What is of Him and what is not.  You will have been successfully trained in your spiritual senses to recognize the truth from the false, because you know the Truth, who is a Person…Yeshua.  From here He shares deeper and more intimate things with you.  The enemy has learned through the years how to manipulate the Word also how to use false prophets to use the Word as to affirm their erroneous teachings.  But when you have cultivated through the years His presence, have cleared the communication lines and have learned His particularly way of speaking to you, which is also very personal, you will be able to discern.  This has also been the plan of the enemy in why He keeps us so busy.  To forsake our ways is not only that we are to stop sinning, but to do that which cultivates fruitful ground for the spoken seed of the Word of God to fall on the ground of our hearts.  We have to consciously choose to slow down and do less.  We have to ask ourselves, “Can this wait?” Do I have to do that today or can I do it tomorrow?  Not because we are lazy and want to get away with our responsibilities, but because we consciously want to slow down in order to be still and hear His voice.  He waits on us to be still.  He waits on us to come to Him and allow Him into our lives.  He remains the perfect gentleman that knocks on the door of our busy lives for us to let Him in.  Imagine that…God waits for us.  Can He barge in?  Yes, we know He can.  But He searches for those who are willing to lay all aside that He may speak to them, so that their souls may truly live from every word that comes from the mouth of God.

Revelation 3: 20

20 Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.

Sunday, June 13, 2021

YOUR THORN

 

YOUR THORN - AUDIO



Today I would like to just speak from the heart.  Just with regard to what Father is dealing with me personally and I know that what He is talking to me about is applicable to everybody that serves Him…and His ways with us.  It has been for a while now that I have been under the weight of His hand upon me with regard to my daughter and the disorders that she has and how it affects me.  And, I have been praying to Him a lot about humility and my heart’s desire is just that He will bring me into greater humility in all that I say, or do or think.  And of course He will use my daughter to do that.  He has always used her amongst other things.  But she has been the primary tool in His hand.  Last night was no different.  I often get woken up by her in the middle of the night, often, pretty much every night.  The point is that when we lose sleep and do not get sleep for an extended time, it wears a person out.  Sleep deprivation is used as a tool for torture.  People know that you cannot think straight because of a lack of sleep. That your resolve is low and you just cannot think straight.  That was the case with me last night and I have noticed that it is just increasing the pressure that Father has placed upon me through her.  And I am being crushed under His hand.  And so last night my daughter just start talking to me about my attitude towards her.  She is expecting me to be all gentle and kind at 12:00 at night and waking me up for the smallest, smallest thing.  But it is huge to her and after a while it loses its novelty and as I went to sleep again, Father just spoke gently to my heart and reminded me of Hebrews 12 where it says that we are to follow peace with all men and holiness, for without which nobody will see the Lord. And that brought such fear in my heart because I was not at peace with my daughter.  In our struggle we so easily say that what is happening to us, is because Father is allowing it and so we can say the right thing, but how we react to it is contradictory to what we confess.  Meaning we know it is from His hand but somehow because it comes through someone, you cannot look pass them.  It is one thing if it happens once in a while.  You know, when somebody cuts in in front on you, or somebody talks badly about you, or something that happens in your life, but then it goes away.  It is easy to look at that and have the right attitude in that moment by humbling yourself and learning from that…and that is good.  But it is another thing if it is year in and year out and there is no end to it.  It is like the scraping away of all your strength.  And it goes on and on and on.  Then eventually you have moments and seasons that you do well and seasons that you do not so well.  When your resolve becomes less and less and less.  And you start to not see the hand behind this person, which is the Lord allowing it, but you start seeing the person that He is using.  This can come in many forms.  It can be out of a broken relationship where your husband, you just know by now that he does not love you anymore or friends that have moved on no longer inviting you, you are no longer part of it, you just a non-entity to them.  Or in my case like a daughter with disorders that just does not go away. It is not that the Lord does not want to heal, it is not that the Lord does not want to touch, or that He does not want to console or anything like that.  But, certain things He brings healing to and other things He allows.  Such as was the case with Paul where he asked the Lord three times to remove the thorn from his flesh. But the Lord said My grace is sufficient for you in your weakness.  So anybody that goes out and tells everybody that the Lord wants to remove this or does not want you to go through that, it may be true, but it is not always true.   And so there has to be an acceptance once you start to realize that this thorn is of Him.  You have to come to a place of acceptance where no longer the thorn is looked to, but Him, that we look to Him.  And that is not very easy if you have gone from year in and year out with pain and suffering in your body, not easy when you yourself has disorders, not easy when day in and day out, for instance your husband is living his life as if you no longer exist.  Or seeing your wife not loving you anymore.  Or seeing your child rebellious, on drugs, wrong friends, whatever it may be. Addicted.  And we look upon these things and we see the evil of it and it is for us to be able to discern, has the Lord given me this thorn or is this from the enemy?  Sometimes we can stand up against something that He has provided long term.  As was the case with Paul’s thorn.  And so in essence this message is to those who have been wearied and burdened under the weight of the thorn that He has allowed in your life.  And to let you know that to kick against the goads as He said to Paul is to hurt yourself and to fight against it is to fight against Him.  And He desires to give us the grace to enter into that weakness and to allow Him to humble us.  That is the only purpose if the purpose is not to seek a solution, if the purpose is not to stand up against it.  But if the purpose is that He may humble you, then there is only one thing you have to do…and that is to humble yourself every single time.  And that takes a moment in time when you commit to it.  And you cannot commit to it 90%, 50%, 99%, you have to commit to it 100%...for as long as He deems.  It might be forever in the sense of our earthly journey.  But we have to commit to that humility and to bow under His hand, because His promise to us is that He will lift us up.  He will give us the grace to endure every single time.  But this cannot happen if we resist the thorn He has chosen in our lives.  So this morning I just want to give you this word that He gave me.  I pray you will take it to the Lord.  And I also I love reading ancient literature from the 1600”s, 1400”s and I came across a Bishop Andrews of the 1600”s that wrote a devotional.  The devotional consists of prayers.  I just want to read one of the prayers.  I have been reading one every morning the different prayers.  I am not one to do that, because I can say my own prayers. But these prayers carry within them such a spirit of humility when read from the heart and it really just humbles me every time.  So I would just like to minister to everybody that will be listening to this word.  And allow the Holy Spirit to minister to you with humility.  Let me start with the Word that He gave to me on the 10th.



YOUR THORN

All who desires wisdom, come unto Me and I will give to you.

Yes, come in faith for that which only I can give.

You have been heavy laden under the cross you have born for Me.

And when you take your eyes off Me in the carrying of your cross, all you see is suffering and pain.

But, as much as My cross is suffering, it is also My glory.  

Have I not said that I know the plans that I have for you?

You think it is to suffer and to bear a cross, but the cross is My means to glory.

There is no other way but through My cross.  

You are weak, tired and can sometimes barely place one foot before the other. 

But it is My cross, My choice of thorn in your flesh that I have purposed for you.

Just like My Father divinely chose the thorn of the cross on My back, My legs, My head and hands.  

I BORE YOUR THORN FOR YOU.

That thorn is bound to My cross

Do not resent the thorn, do not resent My cross.

Pick it up, ask wisdom and I will give it to you liberally.  

I will send the Simons to help you carry on your way.

I will be all you need on your way.

In your weakness, I am strong.  

Let My cross born on your back lay the weight of weakness on you so that you may bear it in My strength.

For My grace is sufficient for you My child...even in this.

Some have laid their cross down, but I have called you to die daily.

Are you a son and daughter without a cross?  Have you no scar to identify with My suffering?  

Therefore, examine your heart whether you resent the thorn I have chosen.  Whether the hand that molds you have become an offense and humble yourself under My mighty hand.

I know the plans I have for you even in this.

NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF THE CROSS YOU ARE CALLED TO BEAR.

My yoke is easy and My burden is light, only by the grace I alone supply.

You have much still to learn, therefore do not despise the means.

Humble yourself under the weight of the cross and I will raise you up.  

When the fight becomes greater, your level of humility too.

That which you see as an obstacle, detriment and suffering, is My provision to humble you for what is to come.

The greater the authority, the greater the humility.


CONFESSION (by Bishop Andrews)

Who can understand his errors 

Cleanse Thou me from secret faults. 

Keep back Thy servant also from presumptuous sins, lest they have the dominion over me. 

For Thy Name’s sake, be merciful unto my sin, for it is great. 

My iniquities have taken such hold upon me that I am not able to look up, 

yea, they are more in number than the hairs of my head, and my heart hath failed me, 

Be pleased, O Lord, to deliver me, 

Make haste, O Lord, to help me. 

Magnify Thy mercies upon me, 

O Thou who savest them that trust in Thee. 

I said, Lord, have mercy upon me, 

heal my soul, for I have sinned against Thee; 

I have sinned, but I am confounded, and I turn from my evil ways,  

and I turn unto mine own heart, and with my whole heart I turn unto Thee; 

and I seek Thy face, and I beseech Thee, saying, 

I have sinned, I have committed iniquity, I have done unjustly. 

I know, O Lord, the plague of my heart, and lo, I turn to Thee with all my heart, 

and with all my strength. 

And Thou, O Lord, now from Thy dwelling-place, 

and from the glorious throne of Thy kingdom in heaven, 

O hear the prayer and the supplication of Thy servant; 

and be propitious towards Thy servant and heal his soul. 

O God, be merciful to me a sinner, 

be merciful to me the chief of sinners. 

Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before Thee, 

and am no more worthy to be called Thy son, 

make me one of Thy hired servants; 

Make me one, or even the last, or the least among all. 

What profit is there in my blood, when I go down to the pit? 

shall the dust give thanks unto Thee? 

or shall it declare Thy truth? 

Hear, O Lord, and have mercy upon me; 

Lord, be Thou my helper; 

Turn my heaviness into joy, 

my dreamings into earnestness, 

my falls into clearings of myself, 

my guilt, my offence into indignation, 

my sin into fear, 

my transgression into vehement desire, 

my unrighteousness into strictness, 

my pollution into revenge. 

Amen

I pray that the Lord will give you the grace to humble yourself under the thorn that He has chosen for your life and I know that He will give you the grace once you have done that.  To raise you up, to cause you to humble yourself each time and that you will grow in humility.  You will grow in love because of that humility, you will grow in self-control. And you will grow to extend mercy and forgiveness to those who do not deserve it.  To the thorns that He has chosen to be placed in your life.  Whatever it may be, relational, financial, does not matter what it is, for our God, His thoughts are not our thoughts and His ways are not our ways.  He loves us with an endearing love, and places His hand upon us, not randomly, but meticulously and purposely He chooses that which will form us and mold us so that He may fill us.  So that nothing will be left of us, but that we will be just an outpouring of His goodness, because there is nothing left of us. This He can only do when we choose to humble ourselves…amen.